August and Everything After

simon & g funk

2011-06-22T21:25:00.001-04:00

dammit, i was born in the wrong generation.

breath of fresh air

2011-04-09T01:22:00.000-04:00

"As a rule, most studies show that mothers are less happy than fathers, that single parents are less happy still, that babies and toddlers are the hardest, and that each successive child produces diminishing returns. But some of the studies are grimmer than others. Robin Simon, a sociologist at Wake Forest University, says parents are more depressed than nonparents no matter what their circumstances—whether they’re single or married, whether they have one child or four."

http://nymag.com/news/features/67024/

little wonders, rob thomas

2011-04-03T22:58:00.001-04:00

let it go
let it roll right off your shoulder
don't you know
the hardest part is over
let it in
let your clarity define you
in the end
we will only just remember how it feels

our lives are made
in these small hours
these little wonders
these twists and turns of fate
time falls away
but these small hours
these small hours still remain

all of my regret
will wash away some how
but i can not forget
the way i feel right now

our lives are made
in these small hours
these little wonders
these twists and turns of fate
time falls away
but these small hours
these small hours still remain

dylan, "to ramona"

2011-03-25T00:07:00.001-04:00

your cracked country lips
i still wish to kiss
as to be by the strength of your skin
your magnetic movements
still capture the minutes i'm in
but it grieves my heart, love
to see you tryin' to be a part of
a world that just don't exist
it's all just a dream, babe
a vacuum, a scheme, babe
that sucks you into feelin' like this

fresh mary jane

2011-03-25T00:03:00.002-04:00

Today I ventured out to the suburbs to Sephora, to pick up a few products I've been running out of. It was there that I discovered this perfume:
Cannabis? I was intrigued. I sprayed a bit onto a testing strip. It smells like patchouli.

Of course it does.

dylan, "just like a woman"

2011-03-23T21:29:00.001-04:00

when we meet again
introduced as friends
please don't let on that you knew me when
i was hungry
and it was your
world.

Really?

2011-03-13T13:50:00.000-04:00

What has residency done to me? Well, I'll tell you.

Me, to patient: Hi, I'm Dr. Sliva, and I have X here with me shadowing. She's a premed. Is it OK if she stays?
Patient: Well, sure! She looks GREAT! (wink, wink) You know, you two could be mother and daughter!

Go 'Cuse!

2011-03-12T18:37:00.004-05:00

Pimped out alone on my couch yesterday (hey, there aren't a lot of Syracuse fans - or any, really - that I know of - in Salt Lake City). Was fun to watch, as always. Scoop Jardine saved the team with two 3 pointers at the end, bringing us into OT, but it wasn't enough. Maybe if Syracuse had hit more than 30% of their shots, things would have ended differently. Just sayin.

Things Marc Would Have Liked

2011-03-04T20:52:00.004-05:00

As many know, we lost my little brother last week to a long illness. *Twice* today I was struck by something funny and inclined to send it along to my brother which, of course, I can no longer do. I still think that somewhere out there, he'd be getting a kick out of these, so I'll post them to share. To you, Marc!
The first, I think, speaks for itself:
The second is actually a reference from the movie Fried Green Tomatoes.
Here's the movie clip that is referenced. Much like Kathy Bates, Marc did a great "Towandaaaaa!"

album of the year

2011-02-14T11:09:00.000-05:00

arcade fire, "the suburbs"

alanis, "hands clean"

2011-02-13T22:35:00.001-05:00

we'll fast forward to a few years later
no one knows except the both of us
and i have honored your request for silence
and you've washed your hands clean of this

When Were You At Your Happiest?

2011-02-03T22:29:00.003-05:00

For me, I think it was living out of a backpack, and the freedom that comes with that. Three outfits to my name and such. I need to strive more for that.

Sounds Fabulous.

2011-02-02T17:48:00.002-05:00

From the New York Times:
http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/02/01/free-time-for-parents/?ref=fashion

"February 1, 2011, 12:50 pm

Free Time for Parents

By LISA BELKIN

Illustration by Barry Falls Life/Work Balance

For months after my son was born I kept a running time tally in my head of time I no longer had to myself. Television I wasn’t watching. Books I wasn’t reading. Conversations I wasn’t having. Sleep I wasn’t getting.

Now a survey in Britain has done the calculating for me. The Co-operative supermarket chain polled 3000 customers and found that after everything else was subtracted, working parents have 90 minutes a day “to themselves.”

The poll breaks down the average day as follows:

Get up 6:42am
Get ready (shower, dress, coffee) 55 minutes
Get children ready 47 minutes
Commute to work 52 minutes
Working day 7 hours
Pick children up 33 minutes
Makes / eat dinner 46 minutes
Children’s play and bedtime 1 hour 9 minutes
Household chores 1 hour 13 minutes
Work from home 1 hour 12 minutes
Go to bed 10:45pm
Spare time = 1hour 30 minutes a day

What is it that parents miss most? Here’s what they told pollsters:

1. Spend more time with the children – 48 per cent
2. Read books – 37 per cent
3. Do more exercise – 34 per cent
4. Put feet up in front of the TV – 32 per cent
5. A lie in – 31 per cent
6. Go to the pub – 30 per cent
7. Have a better sex life – 26 per cent
8. Meet friends – 25 per cent
9. Take a walk in the park with their partner – 22 per cent
10. Go to the cinema – 19 per cent

Does this breakdown sound familiar? Or does 90 minutes of free time sound high to you?

What do you miss about your life BC (Before Children)? How do you sub-divide your day?"

Every day, I am less and less tempted to cross the rubicon into parenthood. To the credit of parents, however, 48% would use any extra free time to spend with their children.

Sarah's Favorite Things

2011-01-27T09:53:00.003-05:00

Procured at Whole Foods, Uncle Eddie's Vegan Cookies in Peanut Butter & Chocolate Chip are, hands down, the BEST damn cookies I have ever had.
I eat them probably too much.

these are words

2011-01-24T00:11:00.000-05:00

They heard me singing and they told me to stop
Quit these pretentious things and just punch the clock
These days my life I feel it has no purpose
But late at night the feelings swim towards the surface

'Cause on the surface the city lights shine
They're calling at me "Come and find your kind"
Sometimes I wonder if the world's so small
That we can never get away from the sprawl

Living in the sprawl
The dead shopping malls rise like mountains beyond mountains
And there's no end is sight
I need the darkness someone please cut the lights!

We rode our bikes to the nearest park
Sat under the swings and we kissed in the dark
You shield my eyes from the police lights
We run away, but we don't know why

In the Black river, your city lights shine
They're screaming at us "We don't need your kind!"
Sometimes I wonder if the world's so small
That we can never get away from the sprawl

Living in the sprawl
The dead shopping malls rise like mountains beyond mountains
And there's no end is sight
I need the darkness someone please cut the lights!

They heard me singing and they told me to stop
Quit these pretentious things and just punch the clock
Sometimes I wonder if the world's so small
Can we ever get away from the sprawl?

Living in the sprawl
The dead shopping malls rise like mountains beyond mountains
And there's no end is sight
I need the darkness someone please cut the lights
I need the darkness someone please cut the lights

Calgon, Take Me Away!

2011-01-24T00:03:00.005-05:00

Not Calgon, actually, but even better. I recently became a big fan of this product:Honestly, it was difficult to extract myself from the bubble bath in time to meet folks out for dinner tonight.
I found mine at Whole Foods. It was about 8$.
But just because it's funny:

3 years and counting....

2011-01-23T23:49:00.002-05:00

I'm back!

It's been three years.

I no longer live in New York City. I live in Utah... and I'm moving to Seattle.

I am married, and I have two dogs. But since my name is not Stepharah, or Sar-phen, I think it's good to have my own blog.

It's good to be back.

Updated: States I've Visited!

2008-01-24T15:44:00.000-05:00

Some of you might remember when I posted this back in the day. Thanks to a geographically diverse interview circuit, I've been able to update my "states I've visted" list. See here:

create your own visited states map
It's funny. Pretty polarized.

Best Med School Rotation EVER.

2008-01-14T16:57:00.000-05:00

I'm in Big Sky, Montana, doing a 4th year medical rotation at the mountain medical clinic. We're ski-in/ski-out, which is great because we're given half days to ski (provided that we work the other half). (Photos are courtesy of the mountain paparazzi.)

Big Sky Ski Resort is quite possibly one of the biggest mountains I've skiied, and we find new glades, bumps, groomers and stashes of powder to ski every day. I'm seeing so, so many interesting medical cases, and learning so much about rural medicine. And in the evenings, we hit up various apres ski activities and ultimately crash for the night in our "cozy" medical student housing (in the backyard of our attending's home!). There are 6 of us students from med schools all over the country.
I would recommend this rotation to anyone. I can't believe this is part of medical school. I don't want to leave! All I need is Steve out here, and I'm set. Never coming home!

PS- Additional photos of our collective tomfoolery, including a shot of me wrapped around a tree on a double black-diamond glade, to be posted soon....

Stupid Commercial

2007-12-31T12:38:00.000-05:00

... and I can't stop laughing.

Big Adventure!

2007-11-17T16:43:00.000-05:00

I've hit the interview trail!

Most of the (limited) readers of this humble site are aware that I'm applying to residency programs in emergency medicine. I just got back from my Massachusetts/Connecticut tour this past week. I'm home for a day (hello, laundromat!) before I take off again tomorrow for the beautiful coast of Maine (and beautiful driving!). I just hope the roads are friendly. Maybe I'll see a moose on the way!

Anyway, I've never done so much traveling in such a short amount of time (travel "density?"). Here are my plans for the next month:
Dec 1-5: Portland, OR with Steve! I think we're going to hit up Mt. Hood or some other ski locale. Wait, of course we are. Steve will be there.
Dec 5-14: Northern California... including SF, Oakland, Sacramento, Palo Alto, and likely wine country. Woohoo!
Dec 14-17: Sunny Albuquerque (or as Danielle is wont to pronounce, "Alba-ker-kyew"). Did I just say "wont"? Anyway, I'm particularly excited about this one. I've never been to NM. I'll have to keep my eye out on the forecast and potentially check out Taos before my interview. I kept asking Steve, are you sure you don't want to come out there? What if I love it? Would you trust me that it's cool?
Dec 17-20: Denver. Woohoo! Always excited to go to Colorado. I won't have time to get out to the mountains, but I've never checked out the city before. Anyone feel like showing me around?

And then, of course, my exciting January travels:
Heading out to Salt Lake City on January 2, though my interview isn't until Jan 4. This is partly because I don't want to risk missing the dinner with the residents on Jan 3, but also because I might be able to get up to Alta with my skis before I interview. Steve and I are heading to Warren Miller's latest flick this evening and I hope to get a discount on a ticket. I'll have my skis with me, because the morning of Jan 5 I pack up a rental car and drive 6 hours north (via Idaho and Wyoming-- how exciting!) to Big Sky, Montana for the month! Woohoo! I'm working in the mountain-side clinic through January 31 and actually getting CREDIT for it. How cool is that? We work half days every day, and the rest is free for skiing. I'm super happy.

Anyway, it's going to be a great (albeit costly) winter season. I figure that the travel is necessary, so rather than bemoan it, I might as well enjoy it. Let me know if any of y'all will be free if I "tour" your area. And if anyone has any pointers on restaurants, "must-see" places or the like, please share!

Engagement Slide Show!

2007-11-07T13:52:00.000-05:00

One of the features that our wedding photographer, Daria Bishop, provides for her clients is an engagement photo session in an environment of the couple's choosing. She then compiles the photo into an online slideshow, set to music (individual images are also available to the couple). We're thilled that our slideshow is complete and posted online! Click here to watch!

Isn't autumn beautiful?

2007-10-25T12:02:00.000-04:00

Below, a few photos taken around my parents' house near Syracuse, NY:

Bridesmaids Dresses! Woohoo!

2007-10-24T23:13:00.001-04:00

We have bridesmaid dresses! I'm so psyched, because this was truly an arduous process. It took a few months to find something that I really, truly love. The dress is from Ann Taylor Celebrations, and I got each of them for approximately 75% off (and free shipping)!! I love this dress so much that I might actually buy one for myself. Seriously.
For all those interested, part of the reason for the great price was an additional 20% off and free shipping with the promo code: 77300050. Offer is good through 10/28/07.
As for the dresses? The photo online doesn't do it much justice (so much that I had written it off until I encountered it in person), so I'd rather not post a pic. So for now, they shall remain a mystery.... much like my dress, at least until May 10!

Kerouac on New York (at least, in the early days)

2007-10-08T11:52:00.000-04:00

"He... saw all the scab of streets in the sickly light before sunup, the vast ruin of rooftops, the gray miles of beaten dust on sidewalks, the terrifying far-disappearing avenues reaching off towards more grayness, more alleys, more barrels and sidewalks, more bulking cities within the city, more debris and hugeness up-piled and sprawled in brick and girder, a shambles, a mournful cracked junkyard leaned non-ending in the gray world. If it were not for the fact that his wife and son were with him in this place he knew he would be like a dead man."
-- The Town and the City (1950)

Oh What a Beautiful Morning!

2007-10-07T10:37:00.001-04:00

Here's a few pics from our hike to Stowe Pinnacle last week. I love Vermont! Happy Sunday!
Steve and I with Camels Hump in the background.

Me and the view!

The beautiful Stowe area below us, and Bolton and Mt. Mansfield off in the distance.

Slightly unrelated, but I wanted to share the pumpkin cheesecake with homemade graham cracker crust that Steve and I made last week. It even had a pecan maple glaze! Steve snagged the recipe from a local periodical. (Here I'm channeling a Stepford wife as I show off our baked goods.)

Wedding Cake?

2007-10-02T12:52:00.000-04:00

To have or to have not? Our reception package already comes with dessert. I'm not feeling the need, really.

Wedding Stuff

2007-09-28T21:29:00.001-04:00

I'm in Vermont for the week and Steve and I have been sooooo efficient at wedding planning. For example:

1. I met with two florists in the area and discussed my love of galvanized sap buckets and pastel tulips. We've gotten an estimate from one and are waiting on the second.

2. We viewed a different, larger church (correction, cathedral), and decided to make a switch. Actually, I should give Steve some credit on this one. He actually suggested it from the get-go, but for some reason the neighborhood didn't sit well with me the first time. I wanted Vermont country. But now, the cathedral seems perfect. I contacted both churches involved, as well as the local pre-cana program, and we have ultimately made a complete switch from St. Stephen's Parish to St. Joseph's Co-Cathedral. I'm really excited. I always envisioned a long aisle and dramatic pipe organs. Plus, a larger church will fit our invite list, which brings me to...

3. We finally came up with our invite list! The first draft was about 245. Yes, I know. Obviously we'd love to have everyone... but we're still tweaking.

4. We've blocked rooms in 5 different area hotels, for a nice variety of location, price, and style (hotel chain vs local bed and breakfast). That was fun.

5. We unofficially have a DJ. Steve and I love Dwayne of Super Sounds, who em-cees for Tuesday night pub quiz in Burlington. We talked to him on Tuesday night after pub quiz and it looks like it's pretty much set. Now we just need to send the deposit!

6. We had our engagement photo session outdoors in Stowe with our fabulous photographer, Daria Bishop (see link at right). It involved lots of frolicking around and kissing. Ultimately, it will be put up into a slide show. We'll post the link as soon as it's up!

So yeah, that's a sample of what I've been up to this week. Otherwise, I've been doing a bit of studying for Step 2, watching Lost, running along the shore, and enjoying myself. Oh, and waiting for interview invites from residency programs. Crossing my fingers!

Signing Off

2007-09-22T10:25:00.000-04:00

Amazingly, 4 weeks have flown by and now I'm headed back east (to Vermont--I have a week off). This experience has been amazing. Pics to come soon.

Hilarious.

2007-09-16T15:13:00.000-04:00

Pictured above is my father, flanked by my cousins Jason and Brian. I can only wonder what inspired this photo...? Anyway, I thought it was hilarious. Thanks for sharing, Auntie Joan!
I just got back from breakfast with the program director of Utah EM and his family. His daughter is applying to colleges this year and is interested in Dartmouth. I was thrilled to be able to talk about my college years... I loved Dartmouth (only a few more weeks till homecoming!). It was also a great opportunity to get to know the PD better and talk about the residency program. What a kind gesture on his part to take me out with his family. People out here are so friendly! I'll be sad to leave next weekend.
I'm realizing now just how wrong NYC has been for me in terms of environment. I'm incredibly happy here, and I've really found a niche in medicine where I can pursue activities I enjoy and still relate them to my career. It's sort of as I suspected... everything works out all right in the end.

My First Utah Summit....

2007-09-15T02:58:00.001-04:00

... and all I have to show for it are these scratches. (There was some minor bushwhacking involved. Pants next time!)
Oh, and a few pics like this (this is my favorite, looking down at SLC and the Great Salt Lake).

Small World, Eh?

2007-09-13T12:43:00.000-04:00

On Sunday when Steve and I were hiking The Pfeifferhorn (dun-dun-DUNNNN), we got to chatting at the summit with some fellow hikers (pictured in one of the photos below as we crested the ridge-- a man and his two children). The man is an internal medicine physician in the area, but his brother turns out to be the program director in Emergency Medicine at Albany. Albany happens to be one of the programs on my list. And who should send me a personal email today but the program director at Albany? It was a very kind letter saying he enjoyed my personal statement; he identified with my outdoorsy side and had similar reasons for pursuing a career in EM. Of course, I HAD to email him back right away, "You may not believe this, but I think I met your brother on a mountainside this past weekend...."

The Last of It

2007-09-12T17:39:00.000-04:00

On Sunday, Steve and I attempted to hike the Pfeifferhorn, the third highest peak in the Wasatch. I say "attempt" because as soon as we got up to the base of the final haul to the summit, we aborted. What can I say, we just weren't interested in such a high probability of certain death if we mis-stepped! (Steve claims he would still do this hike at some point. So would I, now that I'm not staring it's scary-ness right in the face.) I also have to give credit to Steve for getting me up as high as we got. Approaching the base of the summit involved an incredibly steep scramble up fields of talus, some of which was precariously situated due to the pitch of the mountainside. That, and dozens of screeching pikas, made for quite the intimidating ascent. I must admit that I stopped and had a good wail more than once.Scrambling up the steepness....Way up in the sky....Can you spot the pika?

Gettin' Pretty

2007-09-09T00:06:00.000-04:00

It took a lot of decision-making and even more phone calls, but Steve and I (as I have mentioned before) now have a wedding photographer: Daria Bishop! As part of our photography "package," we have an engagement photo session scheduled outside in the brilliant Vermont foliage in Stowe at the end of the month. Which is not so far away, time-wise. Recently, all we've been doing is stuffing our faces and drinking a lot of Utah microbrews. I think we're going to have to start fasting for this photo shoot, or Daria will have to title the session, "Beefy Couple in Love."

Salty.

2007-09-08T22:42:00.000-04:00

Today, we traveled to Antelope Island on the Great Salt Lake. It was big and salty, that's for sure... and much of the lake has wafting breezes that smell of body odor. Up close, there are millions of brine shrimp that swim around the under the water or float, dead, on the surface.
Here, Steve wallows in the Great Salt Lake.
It's pretty Great. And Salty. And shallow.
Antelope Island has many bison (see below). I was especially distraught at the island's one food establishment, the "Bison Bistro," where bison burgers are the main specialty. Oh, look at the wonderous and graceful creatures! Now, let's go eat some!
All in all, it was a fun day of exploration. But I think we still prefer Lake Champlain.

Utahns

2007-09-08T02:29:00.000-04:00

Hi Tom and Kate! Hi all! So... our brief day hike at Alta turned into a real expedition. We ended up hiking the Albion Basin Trail out of the parking lot near the base, got a little lost looking for the Lake Catherine Trail about halfway up and, once reaching Lake Catherine, connected with the Great Western Trail and looped around the Alta ski area (ski lifts, campgrounds, and a family of deer included).
Our legs are a bit sore now (more from the downhill), so we'll most likely sleep in tomorrow and check out Antelope Island on the Great Salt Lake... and maybe hit up Red Rock Brewery on our way out!

Steve is Here!

2007-09-07T12:57:00.000-04:00

Steve got into Utah last night. The plan for today is to show him around town (mostly my hospitals), have lunch at Squatter's brewery, and do a short day hike up around Alta Ski Resort.
I just turned to Steve, thinking about the upcoming wedding and all, and said, "I hate to tell you this, but I am NOT excited about becoming a Mrs." (Bc really, "Mrs." sounds so old!)
"Yeah, but you have an easy out," he said. "Dr."
True dat!

Les Fleurs

2007-09-05T18:53:00.001-04:00

Since my Utah emergency medicine rotation ends on Sept 21, and since I don't have to be back in NYC until October 1, I'm taking this opportunity to fly to Vermont and get a whole lot of wedding planning done. Right now, we have a church, a reception venue, and a photographer. My next item on the agenda was booking a florist. I'd been calling around to florists in VT (from UT, no less) until Steve reminded me that our package at the Hilton (our reception site) INCLUDES floral table arrangements! How could I forget this?! This is huge! Now all I have to do is find out who the Hilton uses, and book the same place to make our bouquets and boutonnieres. My life is suddenly so much more simple. I really wasn't looking forward to planning the flowers, anyway. I just want tulips. Tulips all around, and I'm happy. I'm probably the most boring bride for a florist to deal with. (Or the easiest, depending on how you look at it. And on Mother's Day weekend, that's probably a good thing!)

Pretty Nice View, Eh?

2007-09-04T23:00:00.000-04:00

David (another visiting med student) and I attempted a climb up Mt. Raymond in the Wasatch today. Unfortunately, rogue thunderstorms surrounded us and we had to abort less than a mile from the summit. It was gorgeous while it lasted, though!

Aye, there's the rub!

2007-09-01T22:08:00.000-04:00

Today I heard a cardiac rub! It was on a 26 year old thin woman, so it was unmistakable. (This was after I mistook her husband for her FATHER, but that's another story. Never again shall I make inquisitions as to accompanying party's relations to the patient at hand.) Anyway... the woman came in with chest pain x several days, and her story was basically negative for everything else, barring me from any diagnostic path I could pursue.
Well, I thought, perhaps the clue is in the physical exam. So I placed my stethoscope upon her sternum and was amazed to discover that her strong heart sounds were somewhat muffled by what I can best describe as a scratchy sort of noise. It was a rub! It was pericarditis! A-HA!
It turns out that my discovery bought my patient an echocardiogram... which, to my dismay, did NOT show any pericardial effusion. However, it was enough to convince the attending that we should probably preemptively treat her for it anyway. Which, incidentally, only involves some ibuprofen.
But hey, it was rub-by (rub-ish?) enough to convince him to get an echo in the first place.
So yeah. That was exciting.
In other news... I submitted my ERAS application for residency today! Finally, the ball is rolling. More on that later.

Mountains Galore!

2007-08-30T21:50:00.001-04:00

SLC is gorgeous. I drive around town and am inspired to take photos of the mountainous backdrop as I'm waiting at a red light (see above).

And soooo... I decided to get up in those mountains and explore! Click here for the full set of pics from my hike in the Wasatch (Big Cottonwood Canyon, Lake Blanche trail).

I'm in Utah!

2007-08-26T19:14:00.000-04:00

Just an update -- I just moved out to Salt Lake City for the month. I'm living in Sugarhouse (neighborhood of SLC) with a 30 year old female professional, and I'm spending my days working in the emergency department and hiking in my free time. Here are some pics from my first 24 hours here:
Below is my home for the month. Cute!

My street...

Dog #1, Barto:

Dog #2, Pincho (slightly camera shy):

The illustrious medical center (or part of it):

SLC and (some of the many) mountains, from the medical complex:

Big News!

2007-07-29T18:36:00.000-04:00

I have a wedding dress! See the master dress team below, having celebratory mimosas after picking out THE ONE. Much thanks to Mrs. Burke, Melissa, and Mom!

Tales from the ED

2007-07-26T19:19:00.001-04:00

So a new feature for this site.... I think I'll rattle off my best story(ies) of the day from the emergency department when I manage to get around to posting.

And did I forget to mention? I'm going to be an emergency medicine physician!

For today:
* One of the attendings was seeing a patient and asked her if she has ever had any sexually transmitted infections. "Like what?" asked the patient. "Well," said the attending, "something like gonorrhea, or chlamy--" "GONORRHEA!" exclaimed the patient, aghast at this line of questioning. "I haven't had that in MONTHS!"
* I got to sew up a head laceration (for the second day in a row!) on a man who tripped and fell over his coffee table when awakening this morning. It required 10 stitches. He informed me that he had taken one Ambien before bed last night... which didn't surprise me, when he proceeded to snore, jerk around, and generally NOT hold still (you can't try to hold still if you're not awake!) during my entire suturing procedure. Something was amusing about hearing the whistle and snorts of his snores from under the sterile draping covering his face. While I pierced his scalp with a needle and thread. Multiple times.

Currently reading: Jack Kerouac's The Town and the City. It was his first work, and it's amazing. I had strayed from Kerouac a bit after reading Big Sur, which was a later work written in what I can only presume was some sort of alcohol-induced hepatic encephalopathy. It was a hard to follow first-person account of drunken revelry and hungover malaise, and was not very engaging. The Town and the City, however, harkens back to New England in the 1950s, with enjoyable characters and that rambling, descriptive prose that is so characteristic of Kerouac. I feel like I could underline every other sentence in appreciation. I've loved every page.

Tales of a 4th Year Med Student

2007-07-02T07:33:00.001-04:00

"We're back! Only this time we're seniors.... and we're gonna RULE the SCHOOL!" -- Grease

Today is my first day as a 4th year medical student. I mean, technically I guess you could say I started 4th year the moment I walked out of my Neurology rotation, the last clerkship of 3rd year (gah, what a horrid experience). But today I'm actually ACCOUNTABLE as a 4th year medical student.

Because my medical school doesn't offer a rotation in Emergency Medicine in July, I'm doing this rotation at a couple of our affiliated hospitals: St. Luke's and Roosevelt. Some of you might remember (though I'm not sure I actually ever shared) that I am deciding between Emergency Medicine and Family Medicine for a career. I enjoyed FM, but I've never actually done EM. Thus, the pressure is on to decide if I like EM over this coming month. I have a deadline of July 15 to decide which field I'm pursuing-- I need to decide if I'm going to either a) the Family Medicine national conference in Kansas City from August 1-5 or b) a previously-established away rotation in EM in Salt Lake City from August 25-end of September. I can't do both and still get full 4-week credit for my August rotation, and I need to get plane tickets for one or the other... so a big decision needs to be made, and soon!

Acadia Trip

2007-07-01T20:44:00.000-04:00

For the detailed individual photos, click here.

Happy Birthday, Steve!

2007-06-04T21:40:00.000-04:00

(Technically a few hours early, but whatever.)
June 5 marks the fourth birthday that I've been with Steve. Four birthdays, and I'm still making him those Funfetti cakes that he craves. Here's a picture of Steve on his 24th birthday:

And here, clearly a much older and wiser man (and yet still enjoying his Funfetti) -- Steve turns 27. Look at that conflagration!

Happy birthday, babe!

Here Comes Summer

2007-05-29T18:01:00.000-04:00

This past weekend I unexpectedly had three full days off -- so I hopped on Amtrak and headed up to Steve's parents' house in the Adirondacks for 3 full days of relaxation. It was lovely!

So I realized that I don't really talk much about medicine on this website. Hmm. Is that a good or a bad thing? Anyway, in terms of career decisions, I've narrowed it down to Emergency Medicine vs. Family Medicine. One would allow me to work 36 (very exciting) hours a week for a hefty salary. The other would probably give me more personal satisfaction (I'm only speculating here), but about 1/3 of the paycheck. However, in the end, a job is a job is a job. If I'm going to get bored with a job, because that invariably happens to almost everyone, shouldn't it at least be in something that has better hours and is more lucrative?

Your thoughts and ideas are very welcome!

Me and the Future Hubby

2007-05-22T21:57:00.000-04:00

We're pretty damn cute, aren't we?

Things Underway

2007-05-07T21:35:00.000-04:00

First of all, this weekend I saw a moose! It was amazing! Now, you'd think that a former New Englander like myself would not be so excited over an encounter with such a seemingly common woodland creature... but for me, it isn't all that common. I never actually saw a moose during my 4 years at Dartmouth (barring one very embarassing incident on my freshman trip when I was reduced to barking like a dog from my sleeping bag at what I thought were moose cowering above me, when in fact it was trip raiders bearing ice cream). My first moose spotting was actually my first year of medical school during a trip to Maine for a send-off of a good friend into the Peace Corps.
So anyway, my moose story. Steve and I were checking out a quaint little Bed and Breakfast in Waitsfield, VT for a potential wedding site, and I was to head home via Route 100 (down the center spine of VT) back to my temporary home of Concord, NH. There I was, moseying along, when I noticed a hand-painted sign in the middle of nowhere that said "Moose X-ing." How strange, I thought. If someone took the time to hand paint that and put it up, there must really be moose around! I slowed down and started scanning the trees along the road. If only, if only....
And then-- I saw one! It looked like a horse standing on the side of the road. (No rack, unfortunately. All of my (2) sightings have been of moose women and moose children.) Except, why would there be a horse in the middle of nowhere? I slowed to stop and to my delight, a moose stepped out towards me. I was giddy. Finally, coming face to face with a ginormous creature of nature from the security of my mom's Subaru Forester! Anyway, I think my bouncing up and down and clapping with delight in the manner of a two year old (or similar) frightened the poor thing off. It stepped about 15 feet back and pondered me further. I would have stuck around, but cars started coming, so I moseyed on towards home.
So that was that. Steve and I had a busy weekend, being wined and dined (and cookied, at one place) by the ECHO Center, the Inn at Essex, The Ponds at Bolton Valley, and The Round Barn Inn. Still, I think we've settled on a reception venue... the Hilton at Burlington harbor. Now we just have to pick a date and a church.

My Ridiculousness

2007-04-28T23:55:00.000-04:00

Last week while up in Burlington, Steve and I were in Old Navy. I was returning a bikini that I didn't like all that much, and I decided I would try on a black dress that I had noticed during a previous visit to Old Navy. The dress was black, loose, and billowy, and flowed pleasingly to about mid-calf. And to my surprise and delight, I seemed to be too *big* for a size small. I decided on an extra-small and made the exchange for the bikini I was returning.

I liked my new dress so much that I wore it right away that day. Quite the hippie chick, I donned flip flops and lounged out in Battery Park in my new frock. Heck, I wore it all around town... church street, the waterfront, out to dinner, you name it. When I got home, I washed it and hung it in my closet, ready to wear again when the weather warmed up again.

Today, Steve and I returned to Old Navy, and I found myself perusing the same section of the store in search of similar fun dresses to wear this summer. Until I really started to look at my surroundings. Bikinis and other bathing suits seemed a little, well, larger than normal. Pants had a suspicious elastic waistband around the top. And then, the real kicker-- pregnant mannequins donned extra-stretchy cable-knit v-neck sweaters over swollen plastic bellies.

Yes, that's right folks. My fun, carefree new dress that I wore around Burlington last weekend is actually a maternity dress.

How did this happen??

Not A Bridezilla

2007-04-22T21:27:00.000-04:00

So we're getting underway with a few initial details in wedding planning. There are five locations in Vermont that we're looking at in terms of a reception-- they are (in no particular order) The Ponds at Bolton Valley Resort, the Wyndham (soon to be the Hilton) Burlington Harbor, the Burlington Country Club, the ECHO Center at the waterfront, and the Inn at Essex (featuring New England Culinary Institute). The next step will be securing a Catholic church in the area, though I must admit I'm enamored by the non-denominational Stowe Community Church (at left), we're not sure we'll be able to snag a Catholic priest who will agree to hold the wedding mass there.

Now, not to give the impression that I've become Bridezilla and that this is suddenly going to become Sarah's wedding planning blog, but it's been fun so far. I think we're both pretty excited about sharing our little corner of Vermont, and all we love about it, with our friends and family.

In terms of my life lately... I am working at a very cute, smallish hospital in Concord, NH in Family Practice. Everyone is amazingly nice. My residents give me pointers on trail running, breweries and sushi locations in town, and invite me to dinner at their apartments. I live a mile up the street from the posh St. Paul's School, which provides beautiful running ground amongst the old buildings and the pines. Every morning I wake up to birds chirping and the smell of fresh piney air, instead of the whir of the West Side Highway and the smell of gas fumes and the foul Hudson river. And most of all, I love what I'm doing. It's a little bit of internal medicine, pediatrics, ob/gyn, and psychiatry all rolled in one. It's a lot of preventative medicine, which appeals to my Type A plan-ahead personality. And I love the idea of having a patient base that relies on, and is familiar with, their family doctor. It's a warm feeling. I think the big decision in my career choice is going to come between Emergency Medicine and Family Medicine.

So yes, life is wonderful. I spend my weeks caring for people at a wonderful practice in New Hampshire, and I spend my weekends in sunny, beautiful Burlington with my fiancee. This is exactly what I needed, and I couldn't be happier.

Update

2007-04-18T22:44:00.000-04:00

I am in New Hampshire... and I will be for the next 5 weeks. Correction:I will be bouncing back and forth from New Hampshire to Vermont and back, in an effort to spend some quality time with my fiancee (part of which will invariably be dedicated to wedding planning). Oh, and I'm not going back to New York City ever again. Kidding, kidding... I jest. But I really don't want to. I'm enjoying this chill New England life. I have time to stop and smell the fresh air. I have time to crochet.
Anyway, I brought my camera to take some photos of everything, but I forgot the cord which attaches to the computer. Hence, the map of NH at left. I'll have to post all my photos at once when I return to NYC in May.
I've been tagged in Megan's blog (Wannabe Wino), and my reply is overdue, but it'll have to wait till later this week. Stay tuned....

Tucks!

2007-04-11T07:00:00.000-04:00

Got in some hard-core hiking and skiing over the weekend.... though it looks much more like January than April in this photo! (And yes, this photo was taken immediately post-proposal.)

Engagement

2007-04-10T20:52:00.000-04:00

Happiness, for me, is a quiet cabin. Alone it sits at the base of a mountain, out in the wilderness of New England. In the winter it resides nestled in a blanket of snow, flakes of which melt and drip off the roof as a fire roars from the woodstove within, sending clouds of woodsmoke into the crisp mountain air.

Inside, you'll find he and I. We sleep in as long as possible, rising only to tend to the fire or take a swig of water from a Nalgene. In our separate sleeping bags, we enjoy the silence and the lack of schedule. Soon, one of us (usually me) will pick up a book lying nearby, and will read as the other snores.

The day's activities include woodchopping and stacking, cooking, hiking, exploring, and appreciating. There is no rush. There are no obligations. Time has stopped for us.

The sun falls low on the horizon, perhaps earlier because of the mountains surrounding us, and we retreat again to our cabin. I flip through issues of Backpacker. He creates homemade candles out of an amalgam of used wax and string he has found lying around. There is no light but for the flickering of the candles. There is no heat but for the woodstove nearby. There is no sound but for the drip... drip... drip of melted snow off the roof, and the rustle of a magazine.

This is, as I have said, happiness. And now this happiness is extended, through a mutual promise for always... with a future of companionship in the long days of stacking wood, through the cold, dark nights with no one else in sight, amidst the menial tasks of cleaning up and cooking and cleaning up again, during the days of bright sun and fresh air where hiking trails spread out before us, beckoning our names... a companionship of two matching sleeping bags, one next to the other, snuggled up together beneath the glow of the pale moon.

Sleep Talking... Sleep Walking... But Sleep WRITING?

2007-04-09T22:41:00.000-04:00

Clearly, I have topped myself this time.

This morning I woke up with a pad of paper on my desk. I have vague recollections of writing something on it in the middle of the night, convinced I was set to a very important task, one for which I must take very detailed notes.

What, you ask, did I write?

"Background: one lacey outfit.
2 geographic outfits.
May 2008 wedding.
Will talk to patient's family re: [insert indecipherable word here] fate."

If this isn't some sort of view into the subconscious, I don't know what is. It's like a glimpse into my own brain without the normal filters I have when I'm awake. Except I have no idea what it means. And I think it's hilarious.

Thoughts

2007-04-03T15:02:00.000-04:00

I met with a pediatric emergency med physician today to see about getting a letter of recommendation for an away elective in Oregon next September. He obliged, with the caveat of all the things that I might find potentially miserable about life as an ER doc somewhere down the road. At the top of the list? Burnout.

"Start thinking of something you might want to do in, say, fifteen years," he advised.

Okay. That's easy. I mean, haven't we all thought about what we would have done if we hadn't gone to med school? If we hadn't decided freshman year of college to start taking the requisite premed classes and suddenly found ourselves in senior spring, done with our required courses but with no room and no time to pursue other interests?

And, so... off the top of my head, I would...
1. WORK PART TIME. Actually, this might happen anyway. For an extended period of time (at least till the kids are in school). Which basically negates the whole burnout concept, but hey.
2. TRAVEL. If you need a doc from the US to work internationally? Whoyagonnacall?? That's right. An Emergency Medicine doc. Need someone at your Himalayan base camp? I'm there. Looking for a doc to oversee a clinic in Uganda? I'm so there. Of course, this wouldn't work with youngin's in the picture, but it's something to think about when I'm older and living in an empty nest once again.
3. WRITE BOOKS. Okay, this was probably always my dream job. If I had to quit medicine today, this is what I would do. Generally, I think I would write fiction, but travel guides might be fun as well.
4. BE A FOOD CRITIC. For Zagat, or something. Enough said.
5. TEACH. 22 year olds right out of college go into private school teaching positions. Why can't I?

So that's what I've got thus far. Will keep brainstorming.

Wino

2007-04-02T20:21:00.000-04:00

I think I'm turning into a wino.

One of my great pleasures in life is sitting down with a nice (albeit cheap; I AM in medical school for another year) glass of wine, usually as an accompaniment to my nightly studying. Lately I find myself making the trek down to Union Square at 14th Street to my local Trader Joe's, where I can find a plethora of bottles under $4 (!!!!!) from all around the world. Yes, that's right. $4. I consider myself shelling out the big dough if I splurge for a bottle that's $4.99!

I would love to get into wine, but I really don't have the time (or the money). For now, I'll settle for my Trader Joe's.

But while we're on the subject, I have to point out that I am also a big fan of beer. Counting now, I have sixteen pint glasses and two tasting glasses that I've collected from breweries all over the country. Most recently, Steve and I visited the Evans Brewery at The Pump Station in Albany, NY. While they're famous for their "Kick-Ass Brown Ale," Steve and I both decided that our favorite was the Imperial Stout Plus. Caramelly and smooth. Perfect after a day of snowshoeing. Mmmmm.

Allrighty, back to the Renal Cystic Diseases.

Weekend Activity: Snowshoeing

2007-03-18T21:32:00.000-04:00

Taker-Backer

2007-03-13T20:03:00.000-04:00

If anything will take me back to the glory days of college, it's this website. The bells of Baker Tower are now recorded as audio clips online for us old alumni to revisit. Maybe I'll even start playing the Alma Mater at 6pm every night from my high rise apartment in Manhattan. Just to, you know, revisit the good old days.

I Went to NC This Weekend....

2007-03-11T21:50:00.000-04:00

How rude!

2007-02-15T23:28:00.000-05:00

Today I tried to book a train ticket from work, and I was quite shocked and chagrined to see my card had been declined. On futher investigation this evening post-call, I discovered that someone over in Malaysia had somehow gotten control of my credit card and made a few withdrawals. Great.

The other night over a couple of glasses of Lambrusco, my friend Dan made an assessment of me that I think really confirms the good fit between my personality and Emergency Medicine. He's noticed that my biggest fear career-wise is that I'll be bored. That, and I often comment on how I really wish I could be busier and doing more. Seems like a good match.

Superbowl Cookies!

2007-02-10T18:22:00.001-05:00

As you can see, Steve and I made football-shaped cookies for a superbowl party last weekend.

Here is a picture of a cookie that *I* made.

And here is a picture of a cookie that... AHEM... *Steve* made. Hee.

And finally, a shot of Steve working hard at frosting the cookies. I feel bad. I kinda suckered him into this project. I shouldn't make fun of him, just because his cookies were uglier than mine. ;)

Yum.

2007-01-31T20:24:00.000-05:00

Why are all my posts about food? I think if I weren't going to be a doctor, I would be a food critic. Or a travel guide researcher (except for that pesky fear of flying). Or a wedding planner... nah, couldn't deal with those bridezillas.

Okay, back to the food.

Last week, Will and I went out to dinner at an Izakaya Japanese restaurant (mainly because Will thinks sushi restaurants are SO overplayed lately... and I'm sure he's right... but I still like it anyway). We ordered tea with our meal, and I was delighted to find that what usually tastes like plain old green tea to me actually had what I detected to be a hint of sesame. Except it wasn't... it was a hint of brown rice.

So a couple of days later I was at Whole Foods and found said Japanese green tea with brown rice (also known as genmaicha). And I tell you... it's just as good as what I had in the restaurant.

By the way... we finished our meal last week with Japanese pancakes topped with whipped cream and strawberry... a la mode with sesame-flavored ice cream. But that's a whole 'nother delectable tale of its own!

Update

2007-01-30T19:43:00.000-05:00

First of all, my sunflower is growing! It's been almost a week now, and I was starting to worry that the east-facing side of my apartment (the warm, warm kitchen) didn't get enough sunlight. The only other option would be the southwest-facing bay window in my bedroom, but the room is cold and drafty and would likely kill the little fella. So anyway, you can see the first of three seeds (apparently I'm supposed to weed out the non-dominant ones after a few days) poking it's little head and neck out from the left-hand side of the pot. Grow, my little friend! Reach your arms to the sky!

Next, here is the completed scarf that I showed you all as a work in progress a couple of weeks ago. It's a little hard to tell, but the pink part of the scarf is protruding through a hole in the red part of the scarf, thus providing a snug and stylish fit. ;) It was very quick and easy to make! Unfortunately, it's not such a big scarf, so it is probably best suited for warmer weather with denim jackets and such.

Here is another view of my scarf, just to show the color pattern. I can't really take credit for my artistry. Most of my patterns come from the books Stitch 'n' Bitch, or Stitch 'n' Bitch nation. To paraphrase from Stitch 'n' Bitch, this scarf involved 100 rows of k1p1 in red, stopping to use two skeins of red across a row from rows 45-55 in order to make the hole, and then 100 rows of k1p1 in pink. I used chunky wool with size 10.5 needles.

And finally, here is my latest knitting project... a pair of matching mittens with flip-tops. I'm using FIVE double pointed needles at once! Egads! (You only see four in the picture because four are supporting the stitches... the fifth is used to actively knit.) It's a huge undertaking, and perhaps a giant leap from beginner-style knitting to a much more involved project that requires perhaps more skill than I possess at the current time. I have, I believe, unraveled and begun this project at least five or six times already... and I have to do it AGAIN, because I discovered, upon turning my mitten cuff inside out, that I had dropped numerous stitches. Grr. Oh well! At least they'll be cute when I finally get the technique down! Practice makes perfect.
Speaking of knitting, I think I may hang up my needles come March and break out the crochet hooks for a while. Spring will be springing, and crocheting seems more conducive to lightweight, doilie-type projects. And making flowers from yarn, and such. I'd also like to make a quilt. Once I get one square down, I'll be all set!

Me at age 6

2007-01-27T16:07:00.000-05:00

Thanks to auntie Charlotte for the pic. Disneyworld was good times!

Yummy Stuff You Should Get Your Hands On (If I Don't Eat It All First)

2007-01-27T11:52:00.000-05:00

Steve and I went on a tour of the Cabot Creamery in (where else?) Vermont a couple of weeks ago on our return trip from camping in the White Mountains. Because it was a dreary Sunday and our tour was consequently private, I felt bad just peacing out after the nice middleaged tourguide had proudly taken us back through the troughs of curds and whey for an hour. So I bought this cheddar shake. And it. is. amazing. I'm embarassed to say that once I finish the popcorn upon which I shake it, I lick my fingers and scrape the bowl until every last bit is consumed. It is just that good! I don't know if this powder of the gods is actually offered outside of New England because of its shelf life, but if you happen upon it in your local grocery, I highly recommend spending the $3.50 or so for a little shaker of heaven.

Indecision: The Beauty of Third Year

2007-01-27T09:47:00.000-05:00

Subtitle: A Woman's Right to Change Her Mind

I think I've finally come up with a career plan that I not only can "tolerate," but would excite me to get out of bed each morning, that would leave me the flexibility to work part-time when necessary, that would allow me to leave at the end of the day and not be called into work the middle of the night, that would allow me to work with exciting pathology, that would keep me busy throughout the entire work day (I always said my favorite jobs were waitressing... I hate sitting around!), that would keep me active and moving, that would allow me to work outdoors (!!), that would allow me to attend conferences at awesome, exciting places such as Taos, NM and Big Sky, MT... in short, that would allow me to combine my profession with my passion.

What is this wondrous career, you ask?

Emergency Medicine, with a fellowship in Wilderness Medicine.

I can't believe I didn't think of this, or at least seriously consider this, earlier! From the Wilderness Medicine Fellowship Program at Stanford University website:

"Fellows will be encouraged to assist as educational liaisons for national and international wilderness organizations such as the Wilderness Medical Society, National Outdoor Leadership School, Outward Bound, National Ski Patrol, National Association for Search and Rescue, American Mountain Guide Association, Himalayan Rescue Association, South Pacific Undersea Medical Society, U.S. Army Research Institute of Environmental Medicine, Union International des Association des Alpinisme, Swiss Foundation for Alpine Research, American Alpine Club, Denali Medical Research Foundation and International Society for Mountain Medicine; as well as regional and local agencies such as the Bay Area Mountain Rescue Unit. Graduates will become educational role models for others who want to pursue similar academic interest."

Ben & Jerry's Makes Potted Soil

2007-01-24T19:22:00.000-05:00

I went to Vermont over the past weekend, and upon an excursion to City Market -- the local hippie organic food store in Burlington -- I came across Ben & Jerry's latest pint.... but instead of yummy ice cream, this pint is full of compost from the local intervale, and complete with sunflower seeds. I was sold immediately. Nothing like a mini-garden on my windowsill high over the streets of New York City to cheer me up!

In Vino Veritas

2007-01-18T18:53:00.000-05:00

Last night was great, in that "let's get together with friends and do something different" sort of way. Richard, at left, is the biggest wine connoisseur of all my friends (and that says a lot, what with Megan and her website and Sonja taking after her mother, the sommelier (sommelieuse?)). Last night, he treated a bunch of us to a real wine tasting, with four different glasses. Followed by lots of yummy cheeses... goat cheese, brie, gouda, and things I cannot name and sure as heck can't spell. Cheers!

My Little Brother Is Funny

2007-01-16T15:03:00.001-05:00

In response to the poem I had posted below, my bro put together his own little piece.

today i had a slice of pizza. the size of it made my mouth water. i folded it and dipped it in blue cheese and didn't share with anyone. The whole thing was for me and me alone. That slice of pizza made me so happy, as pizza often does. Just lately. The sleeping. Sitting in front of the TV. This food and laziness. Its not new to me. The rest of my day was about the same. I put off all the jobs on my list. I enjoyed another slice of pizza and had some time to use the bathroom in peace. I love myself. I'm glad pizza exists. (marc murray, "my slice")

Not That I'm One to Pilfer....

2007-01-15T19:09:00.000-05:00

... but I really enjoy this poem, yoinked from the Poetry Experiment.
At lunchtime I bought a huge orange
The size of it made us all laugh.
I peeled it and shared it with Robert and Dave—
They got quarters and I had a half.
And that orange it made me so happy,
As ordinary things often do
Just lately. The shopping. A walk in the park
This is peace and contentment. It’s new.
The rest of the day was quite easy.
I did all my jobs on my list
And enjoyed them and had some time over.
I love you. I’m glad I exist.

(Wendy Cope, "The Orange")

I Wish I Could Go Back to College

2007-01-15T18:27:00.000-05:00

I wish I could go back to college.
Life was so simple back then.
What would I give to go back and live in a dorm with a meal plan again!

I wish I could go back to college.
In college you know who you are.
You sit in the quad, and think, "Oh my God!
I am totally gonna go far!"

How do I go back to college?
I don't know who I am anymore!
I wanna go back to my room and find a message in dry-erase pen on the door!

I wish I could just drop a class...
Or get into a play...
Or change my major...
Or f-ck my T.A.
I need an academic advisor to point the way!

We could be...
Sitting in the computer lab,
4 A.M. before the final paper is due,
Cursing the world 'cause I didn't start sooner,
And seeing the rest of the class there, too!

I wish I could go back to college!
How do I go back to college?!

I wish I had taken more pictures.

But if I were to go back to college,
Think what a loser I'd be-
I'd walk through the quad,
And think "Oh my God...
These kids are so much younger than me..."

~Avenue Q

Knitting Projects

2007-01-15T16:56:00.000-05:00

So, my latest knitting projects involve adding pom poms to hats, and a hat/scarf/mitten set for Valentine's Day. At left, one of the first hats I ever made... I made it to match my ski jacket. It's made of 85% wool and 15% mohair (note: sheds everywhere!). This weekend, on a jaunt down to Knitty City, I picked up both a regular and jumbo-sized pom-pom maker. This pom-pom I made is of the regular sized variety, and was quite easy to construct.

Here I am modeling my lovely hat with pom-pom. I kinda had to move the pom-pom to the front, so you could see it. ;)

And finally, here's the scarf I'm working on. It's half red/half pink, as you can see... but look closer! There's a hole in the middle of the red portion, for which to tuck the pink half of the scarf through and pull snugly around one's neck. Neat, eh?

And finally, to update...
Currently reading: The People's History of the United States, by Howard Zinn. I'm kinda on an American History kick, so I thought I would run with it. (And I am, literally... I have mp3s from Kenneth Davis' "Don't Know Much About History" that I take with me on my jogs!). But anyway, I'm enjoying the book. It's definitely got a liberal bent, whereas I would have preferred unbiased, but it's interesting and I'm learning a lot. The more you know....

Sarah Says the Darndest Things

2007-01-13T14:36:00.000-05:00

I can't help it. The combination of me being a medical student and me just being... well, ME is often bad. I need to remember I can't just talk about my job like any other person. Unless I'm working for obstetrics, it's generally a bad thing for people to want or need my services as a medical student.

Cases in point:

Over holiday, at Christmas party, I was talking with a friend of the family about how he often drops down into the city for work. He mentioned something about looking me up when he's in New York the next time, and for good measure (without thinking), added, "Though with school, I'm rarely free. But if you ever need a hospital while you're in New York...." Hrmmm. Not the generous extension of grace and hospitality I meant it to be.

And today, at my favorite yarn store, the cashier asked for my zip code. I obliged him, after which he promptly noted, "That's up by Columbia, right?" I nodded yes, and told him I am a medical student there. After I had paid, he asked me what year I was. "I'm a third year," I told him. He asked if that is the year we do clinical rotations. "Yes," I told him. "So if you need a pediatric urologist....[man gives me puzzled look at this point]... um, because that's what rotation I'm currently on.... nice to meet you, bye!"

Man. I need to learn to just smile and nod!

Acadia!

2007-01-10T09:12:00.000-05:00

In other news, I want to start planning my next vacation. (I know what you're thinking. I know I just got back from vacation. Perhaps that's why I'm thinking about my next one... before I am ground into submission and once again forget I have a life outside the hospital! Kidding... I jest.)
Steve and I have been contemplating a move out west, and we've never done the whole Acadia National Park thing. I think we had discussed going for the weekend for my 25th birthday, but those ideas were rapidly abandoned when we realized our "quick New England vacation" was really a 7 hour drive away. Yes indeedy, the "west coast of New England" of Burlington is quite a jaunt from the east coast of New England. But anyway, it's something I think we'd both like to do before moving out west. Explore our east coast roots, and all that.
I have the final week of June off, and I think that would be the perfect time to go to Acadia. And I would love to do the planning this year, after Steve busted his butt to plan a perfect Zion vacation last summer (see June 2006). It's the least I can do. Oh- and one of the big draws for me is NO FLYING. Yay! (I don't know that I've mentioned, and you certainly wouldn't think so because of all the traveling I do, but I hatehatehate airplanes. Well, maybe not planes themselves, but the act of being suspended thousands of feet in the air by some mechanical bird that could plummet to the ground so very easily if one little thing went wrong.)
So anyway, I'm going to start looking into resources and such. If anyone has any particularly fond Acadia memories, including good hikes or camping spots, let me know! I'm also interested in fun things to do in the area, such as good breweries and whatnot. Let me know!

I Love How I Do This to Myself

2007-01-10T08:16:00.000-05:00

So, just like *that*, I woke up this morning on a Psychiatry kick.
Sarah, the psychiatrist. Hmm.
It's definitely something I've been considering (maybe more so since I received my evaluation earlier this week). Maybe I had ruled it out because it just didn't seem like medicine. I'm in medical school, duh... why would I go into something so brain-oriented and seemingly "fluffy?"
But then I started pondering the idea of doing a sub-internship in psychiatry my fourth year. Sub-I's, as they are called, are a good way to see what life as a resident in a particular field would be like. This morning, I considered the idea of doing a sub-I in psychiatry, and one in peds (as I had pretty much always planned). The idea of a peds sub-I kind of stresses me out. As in, "Okay, it's going to be grueling. But I'll tough it out. Because that's what life in medicine is going to be like! Tough! And I need to get used to that! And hopefully it won't always be so tough, and I'll eventually have a life, and I'll find time for my husband and my own kids and hiking and knitting and... oh, but I like kids, so hopefully I will enjoy my peds sub-I, as well." Yikes.
But then I'm thinking, "I should do a Psychiatry sub-I. You know, just to see what it would be like. That sounds like fun. Sitting with people and talking with them and hearing their life stories. Helping Mrs. X with her depression with psychotherapy and pharm management. Talking with Teenage Girl regarding her battle with anorexia. How interesting. I can't believe people get paid to do this."
Hmm. Why have I been discounting Psychiatry? I think I've been in a mindset where Psych isn't really medicine, it's not what I did 4 years of med school for (why did I spend so much time learning about pathophysiology of a myocardial infarction if I'm only going to be a psychiatrist?) -- that sort of thinking.
But whatever. For some reason, considering Psychiatry feels like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders.
But you know me... tomorrow it might be back to Peds, or Emergency Medicine, or whatever flavor of the week. Stay tuned...

PS -- I'm beginning to think my bent towards children might be because I want my own. (Ack! Not yet!) I think the things I *really* loved about pediatrics were playing with the newborns and entertaining crying children in the examination room with my stethoscope and my hospital ID. I spent about a half hour yesterday in the peds urology waiting room (waiting on an attending to spend the morning with him), and tears literally sprang in my eyes watching the kids interact. Good lord, I am a sap. (I am always a sap, though. I cry at commercials -- just ask Steve -- and I cried at my brother's high school graduation. Did you hear that? My brother's. High school. Graduation.) I could not stop myself... I was cooing at the babies sitting next to me alongside their moms (which made it interesting when I sat in on their appointments later), and laughing out loud at one particular toddler with a remarkable fascination with the fish tank. But anyway, my point is that maybe what I like more about peds are the kids themselves, not so much pediatric medical problems. Peds might just be the venue for me, in that case.... but this also might be alleviated (ha- I love it- "alleviate" the desire to spend time with kids... bad Sarah!) by having my own kids.

Blogger, I Loathe Thee

2007-01-09T18:48:00.000-05:00

I got out of Urology today at 2pm (fantastic!), but spent the greater of my free time trying to figure out exactly why I can't upload my photos like I used to be able to. Blogger has gotten all fancy and, in the process of converting old accounts to new ones, somehow has managed to mess up my user name/password combo, preventing me from using the photo manager. I can do one photo at a time, at best... a long and tedious process. So... at left, my Christmas vacation, the condensed version.
What else exciting happened today? Not much, really... I saw the doc about increasing pain around my tailbone (x 3 months), who named it "coccydynia" and gave me a referral for an xray and an appt with orthopedics. Again, it's interesting to be the patient.

Teaser

2007-01-08T22:51:00.000-05:00

This photo is the first of many photos from my break... I finally figured out how to use my new camera and upload photos from it. This shot was taken last week in Burlington. See the nice hats that I knitted for Steve and myself?
Stay tuned for more photos and vacation stories, as well as tales about the phallus from beyond the operating room doors....

Ohhhh Back to School

2007-01-08T17:29:00.000-05:00

So I'm back, and I have lots of pictures of my vacay (which was absolutely wonderful, and life-altering in that "wow I *do* know how to live life at not such a breakneck pace" sort of way). I'm still figuring out how to transfer pics from my new camera, so the vacation stories will have to wait.

Right now I'm on Urology for 2 weeks. I have managed to finagle my way onto the pediatric service, which I'm psyched about. I spent the day circumcising and fixing varioceles. Yeah, literally. My first operation with Urology, and the chief resident handed me the scalpel and was like, "Here. Take off the foreskin." What? Me?!

Voulez vous crochet avec moi, ce soir?

2006-12-27T11:28:00.001-05:00

So I discovered that my problem with crocheting is that I was trying too hard to liken it to knitting. I actually even picked up a pattern and tried to go at it immediately, just by referencing the various pages of how to do the various stitches. Ha! Finally, after starting and beginning again several times, and putting the yarn down for a while, I returned and started learning to crochet the old-fashioned way... from the beginning.

Now I am proud to say I am the owner of my very first swatch (for those not familiar with needlepoint, a swatch is a small piece of fabric that one has created out of a simple stitch or collection of stitches, usually just to get an idea of what a particular yarn will look like when knitted or crocheted into a pattern. My swatch is just a few rows of a simple single crochet stitch, but it's cute. And dense! Crocheting uses far more yarn than knitting.

Today I am going to do a swatch in each of the following: half-double stitch, double stitch, and triple stitch. Good times. Then maybe I'll work on crocheting some flowers and maybe even start on that hat I was trying to do too soon.

And now, a new addition to my website....

Currently reading: Middlesex. I'm about halfway through. I actually received this book for Christmas last year, but I never got around to reading it (despite the fact that I had asked for it as a gift) till *this* Christmas break. It's very interesting and historical, but I have to wonder exactly how much is true history. Anyway, it's the story of an individual with 5 alpha-reductase deficiency. Calliope, or "Cal," was born as a girl, but no one realized he was actually male until puberty. Good reading, and makes me feel like I haven't completely left my medical studies down in NYC for the break.

Crochet Away

2006-12-26T15:43:00.000-05:00

This crocheting, it's difficult. I've mastered the crochet stitch, but I'm halted at the single crochet stitch. And somehow I'm supposed to be making a hat?

So what is telemarking?

2006-12-25T21:49:00.000-05:00

Since you asked, I will tell you.

First of all, telemarking is in no way related to telemarketing. At right, a skier is pictured telemarking. This type of skiing involves equipment in which only the toes of the ski boot are affixed to the ski binding. The ski boot has an element known as the "bellows," which is somewhat flexible, allowing the boot to bend at the toe. You will notice that the skiier's skis are staggered, with the uphill ski trailing and the uphill heel raised from the ski.

I grew up skiing. One of my earliest memories is bombing down the bunny slope (affectionately known as "The Bunny Hop" at local Song Mountain, where all trails are named after - what else? - songs), trying to impress/scare my mother at the bottom of the hill, only to ski face-first into the line for the J-bar lift... and catching the rope from the line under my upper lip. Man, that bled.

When I was older in about 6th grade or so, weekends during the winter were spent over at "the mountain." Every day at lunch, my friends and I would trample home across the street from the mountain in our ski boots for grilled cheese and tomato soup, only to return to our racing, jump-building and dodging the ski patrol in the afternoon. Occasionally we would choreograph song and dance routines as we went down the slopes, involving locomotive-style arrangements, skiing on one ski, or dumping our poles at the lift line. I remember warm days when we wore shorts, and not so warm days when we suffered with bare ears because we established it was not cool to wear hats. One time we even fit four of us on the triple chair, which amounted to a huge scandal in my eyes. At the end of the day, we would stomp in our ski boots into the private Thunderbird Lodge (where some of our friends' families were members), and partake of the free cheese, crackers, pepperoni and orange soda, warming our feet by the ginormous fireplace and watching Warren Miller movies playing on a TV in the corner.

A few years later, I earned my season ski passes as a ski instructor to children. For six weeks each season, I worked 8 hours a day for both days of the weekend; after this "regular instruction season," we chose one day each weekend to work. During the week, I spent upwards of 6 hours a night at the mountain, as a member of both the local high school ski racing team and the mountain's own junior ski racing team. It would get dark around 5pm, after which the lights on the mountain came up and we ran gates in the brisk night air with giant shadows cast by the chair lift towers. I remember one night cutting under the T-bar line with some teammates, only to run over some exposed gravel, which caused bright sparks to fly from behind my friends' skis in dark night. Most races were on Fridays. I thoroughly enjoyed getting up early those mornings, taking buses and vans to places like McCauley Mountain and Swain. I loved the culture of racing -- the attire, the friends I made, the rituals of waxing and tuning skis, slipping the course before races, the universal and frank announcement of "racer time" at the end of a run, the way we'd leave our speed suits on after races with the trunk and arms dangling down behind the backs of our jeans, the post-race rosiness of our cheeks that lasted till the next morning...

So what I mean to say is, ski culture has defined my life since I was a very young girl. I picked up telemarking because I wanted to try something different. I felt stale in my ski persona as an ex-instructor and racer.

The only trouble is, telemarking is kicking my ass. I feel like I have the motions down. I don't think I look like a mess when I go down the hill. The only trouble is, when I'm skiing with a group, I'm always the last down the hill. By a lot. I make ten turns, and I have to stop and catch my breath and let my burning legs recover. Telemark skiing, to me, is a lot like that workout stance where you bend down to a squat against a wall, with your legs at a 90 degree angle and your thighs parallel to the floor.

I've considered a few solutions:
a) Stop making myself do all telemark turns down the hill. Mix them up with alpine turns. (But this sorta feels like cheating to me. What's the point of telemarking?)
b) Moderate my telemark stance so that I'm not sinking down quite so low. (I don't especially like this option because it took me so darn long to perfect this stance in the first place.)
c) Stop being such a pansy about falling down and start skiing faster... the faster you get down the hill, the fewer turns you have made, and the less time you spend in grueling pain. (This option is the most attractive right now, and allows me to save face as the current weakest link in groups with whom I ski. I DID just buy a ski helmet, as well... However, I just took an aweful face plant over the tips of my skis on Friday at Sugarbush -- which my boyfriend likened to looking like I had been tackled from behind -- so I may need to work on my psyche before I start bombing down mountains on skis which are only fastened to my body at my toes.)

In other news, it was a rather wonderful holiday. I've been really lazy and eating embarassingly large amounts of Moose Munch from Harry & David's. It's terrific. I have a great new digital camera with which I will finally be able to add pictures to my blog again, and two new books on needlework. One is an additional book of knitting patterns, and another is a primer on crocheting. I'm super psyched to start crocheting lots of wardrobe pieces, actually. I may end up walking around Manhattan in manner of a granny or similar, but hey.

Anyway... Merry Christmas!
Glory to the newborn King!
Peace on Earth!

Home Again, Home Again, Jiggety Jog

2006-12-24T16:20:00.000-05:00

I'm half writing this post, and half watching an "Everest: Beyond the Limit" marathon on the Discovery-Times channel (New York Times? LA times? What is this channel, anyway?), so forgive me if it's somewhat jarbled and incoherent.

Home is good. I sleep lots, I run in the fresh air, I play with the dog and the cat, I watch lots of satellite TV, and I fall asleep in front of said TV. This evening, my little brother is even taking me out to dinner at the Scotch and Sirloin in Syracuse with his company. Wonders never cease. (Hmm, maybe I shouldn't be such a stickler about making him replace my NYC popout map he demolished when he last visited me in the city.)

(Man, this Everest show is crazy. They keep walking by all these bodies of dead mountaineers -- cameras are affixed to their gear -- and some of these perished climbers are people about whom I've read accounts. Also, did you know that when you're near the summit of Everest, you have to be careful not to breathe with your mouth too much open because you can sunburn the roof of your mouth? Of course, that would only apply if you are insane enough to not be using oxygen tanks/masks. But hey, it's a cool fact.)

I'll have to be taking off soon, I expect. Christmas Eve mass is at 6pm, and mom wants to be at the church by 5:10, 5:15 to secure a seat. You'd think we were camping out in K-Ville for Duke basketball tickets.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night! Turn on this Everest marathon if you get a chance. I'll be on all night, till the wee hours of the morning.

I Can't Walk

2006-12-20T21:48:00.000-05:00

(Unrelated, at right, Steve and I are skating at Turtle Pond in Boston on Saturday. Happy Birthday, Erin!)

I telemarked yesterday, and now I hurt. A lot. I hurt in places I don't think I've ever even hurt before. It hurts to walk. It hurts to sit. Owowow. All in all, though, despite being alone and despite only one run at Smuggler's Notch being open, I'm glad I went. While solo skiing can be boring (I've been known to "spice up" my solo ski days with USMLE Step 1 review MP3s in the past), I amused myself by seeing how many telemark turns in a row I could make before my thighs burned so much I couldn't take it anymore.

So, as it turns out, I never actually had strep. I got a sheepish phone call from Student Health Services on Tuesday, saying that my cultures actually came back negative. While contracting strep throat during one's Pediatrics rotation is a great story, I was pretty psyched to be able to quit the Penicillin. Hello, Vermont microbrews!

The current plan is to sleep in some more tomorrow (I *still* am recovering from my first semester of third year, combined with whatever wacky virus I had last week), and do some more telemarking on Friday with Steve at Sugarbush before heading home to the respective fams in upstate New York.

Keep doing the snow dance!

And I'm Off

2006-12-15T12:58:00.000-05:00

Thanks to everyone for the well-wishes over the last day, and thanks to Tom for Yatta (honestly, I much prefer semi-naked Asian men hopping around from leg to leg yelling "You! You! You! You! Us! Us! Us! Us!" and "Ohioooo!" to Richard Carpenter's creepy smile any day).

I'm recovering ever so slowly, which means that I took today's Pediatrics Shelf exam under a thick haze of both Dayquil-induced stupor and general illness-related dysphoria. I don't think it mattered much; had I been healthy and had 100% of my wits about me, that exam still would have violated me. A lot of the questions were pretty simple, but on a large number I just had no idea what they were getting at. Oh well, I tried my best and that's all anyone can do (a lesson I've picked up from Mom over the years). I seriously did over 1,000 practice questions and almost got through my review book twice, so it's not like I slacked off. If I had tried any harder, I'd be the med student zombie/automaton that I've always feared becoming. So... I'm just going to chalk it up to a difficult exam and move on.

Speaking of moving on... gotta catch a Super Shuttle to JFK in 15 minutes! I'll write again from Burlington (whee!).

2006-12-14T09:52:00.000-05:00

I have strep throat. (Of course I do. I'm on my pediatrics rotation.) So I'm confined to my room, with a bottle of penicillin and lots of review books. Except that I feel like I've been run over by a truck, and I nap every half hour. Man, I'm a wuss.

2006-12-10T20:55:00.000-05:00

Please! Someone get this song out of my head! It's hilarious to watch Richard Carpenter on the keyboard, but now I can't stop singing it in my head.

2006-12-10T20:21:00.000-05:00

Just in case my request for a pretty photo of winter in NYC was not necessarily referring to a *current* photo, here is a pretty photo of winter in lovely Manhattan as it once was:

2006-12-10T20:13:00.000-05:00

So first off, I have a request to post a nice photo of New York right now. I assume this request is in light of December, and the holidays, and what would historically evoke ideas of a "white Christmas," with horse-drawn carriages towing mittened and earmuffed riders in Central Park, scarved ice skaters at Rockefeller Center, and children with rosy cheeks with their noses pressed up to the show window glass at F.A.O. Schwartz. Unfortunately, all, due to global warming, this is not so much the case. Today's Christmas in New York looks a bit like this, at left. So... sorry to disappoint. And you can all bet that I'm just as disappointed as you are. I had visions of glorious skiing over my winter break, but as it stands, Song Mountain is completely bare, and Smuggler's Notch has a handful of semi-covered trails up for skiing that are so skiied off by lunchtime that even my die-hard telemarking boyfriend hit the parking lot hours before closing on his first day out. Global warming, my friends. Global warming.

Anyway, the weekend was fun. Went to dinner with some random friends from class on Friday night, and came home early with Emily. My bed, with its goose down comforter, was just too temping. Saturday was productive, and I finished it off with a concierto downtown near Lincoln Center, featuring a violinist from my med school class (former concert master at Yale). Today I got dim sum with a bunch of friends from class, and met up with some college friends who are in town for a few days. It was wonderful to see them.

My knitting is really coming along. I wish I could take some photos to demonstrate but a) my camera is broken, thanks to United Airlines, and b) I can't very well post pictures of Christmas presents I will be distributing in two short weeks. My next project may be mittens. We'll see how hard the pattern is.

One more week of Peds, and it's vacation-time! As much as I love the kiddies, nothing sounds sweeter to my ears.

2006-12-08T23:44:00.000-05:00

I feel like the great gimmick of medical school, what with its keeping you in house for crazy numbers of hours and drawing your concern into the sole pursuit of pleasing your superiors, is making you forget that a number of things, a number of things of great import at that, go on outside of your microcosm of a world.

2006-12-08T13:54:00.000-05:00

It's winter! I just made my way home from my Peds outpatient clinic in brisk 23-degree weather, and my apartment is perfectly inviting with the afternoon sunlight spilling onto the hardwood floor and shag rug, and heat emanating from the radiators.

In one week, I'll be taking off (literally) to Burlington, VT for my three-week Christmas break, and I can't wait! Smuggler's Notch, my home mountain (solely because they both are located close to my boyfriend's apartment and because they run such a sweet deal for people who ski more than enough to justify buying several day passes but not quite enough to warrant a season's pass) has finally opened, and Steve has informed me that Burlington got a nice blanket of snow last night. But before I enjoy the first skiing of the season, we'll be driving down to Boston next Saturday for a friend's birthday party in Boston (involving ice skating, the Cheesecake Factory, and the Dartmouth-Harvard hockey game!). I'm psyched. Seven more days and then freedom!

Frustration

2006-12-05T21:41:00.000-05:00

Just because something isn't coming as easily to you as something you aren't really interested in, does that mean you shouldn't pick it as a career? If I'm good at working with psychotic patients under lock-down, but am struggling to really have a command of taking care of sick children, does that mean that I'm naturally more inclined to be a psychiatrist? Should we really follow paths which come easily to us, because it means that we are better at them in general? Or should we wage a constant battle to do what we think we prefer?

Today....

2006-12-04T20:48:00.000-05:00

... while working in the Peds ER, I treated kids with:

1) scabies
2) a boil (really, an abscess... but boil sounds worse), and
3) ringworm.

Oh, and a kid had roseola. But that didn't quite fit under the children-with-nasty-creepy-crawlies-on-them category.

Fun day. Good times.

Oh, and I may have made some progress with getting school approval for the Medical Clinic at Big Sky elective for next January. At any rate, the dean seems more positive.

I'm really enjoying the peds ER. It's a bit less boring than being a general pediatrician and giving shots all day. Speaking of shots, though, I should really give the outpatient clinic another shot. (OK, bad pun.) But still, the whole ER thing does mesh well with my outdoorsy edge, n'est pas?

The NYC Catholic

2006-12-03T17:43:00.000-05:00

Ok, so I'm not trying to be a traitor to my faith or anything, but what is with these New York City Catholics? It's almost invariable at any church you enter... as soon as it's time for communion, people leap from their pews, regardless of how far back from the altar they are, and sprint in a free-for-all for the front. People from the back are plowing over those who are slightly slower at getting up from their kneelers at the front. It's like these people are afraid the priest will run out of wafers, or something. Whatever happened to the good, old-fashioned, row-by-row communion?

I liken the situation to people who rush to get to the gate doorway when the airline attendant makes a first call for boarding... or likewise hover around the line, tickets in hand, waiting for their boarding group to be called. PEOPLE. You are not going to lose your seat! I guarantee it will still be there for you, even if you're the last one to board.

Tales from the Doctor's Office

2006-12-02T18:46:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I spent my first day working in a pediatric outpatient clinic, which is significant, because it's kind of what I've always pictured myself doing for the rest of my life. Here are some funny/odd/almost scary stories from day 1:

- One family named their child Naitsirhc. Yes, that's right. Naitsirhc. This seemed really unpronounceable and even more random, until I realized it's "Christian" spelled backwards. What does that mean? Are they just really innovative and non-conformist Christian parents? Or, is this some family that ascribes to the occult, and spelling Christian backwards is some subversive way of going against all that is holy? Hmm.
- Another mother spent a full ten minutes going on and on about how she didn't like her child's teacher, the teacher was killing his self esteem, she was thinking of pulling him out of school, how she was considering a child psychiatrist, and how she had already spoken to some attorneys. Her son was at the office to follow up on a sore throat, or something menial of that nature. Meanwhile, five other rooms full of screaming children and impatient parents waited. Standing between that woman and the physician, who kept trying to veer the mother back on course for what he was able to treat her child, was pretty darn tense. An hour after she and her son left, the woman was back in the office and cornered the doc in the hallway, asking to speak to him in private. It was nothing, I found out later. More talk about her son's self esteem and what to do about the teacher in question.
- Some parents are weird in a downright scary way. The mother of a child with croup called into the office for help, but had the hardest time accepting that the best thing for her child was a low dose of steroids. "I don't want to put anything like that into my son's body!" "What if we just wait it out?" Finally, the doc firmly told her that the treatment was non-negotiable, and if she didn't come in for steroids, her son would invariably be in the ER that night. When he got off the phone, he told me she had also declined all standard vaccinations for her son thus far. Which shocked me... not only because it's incredibly dangerous, but because the physician still treated the child. "Usually," he told me, "we tell these parents to find another practice. It's a huge liability." I'm sure.

I Just Wanted to Say...

2006-11-28T19:19:00.000-05:00

I'm 99.9999% sure I am going to be a pediatrician. Unless, you know, I fall in love with urology next semester. Which is surely not going to happen.

I love them little kiddies, especially the babies, and the last few weeks have been (a completely and utterly exhausting but still exhilarating) blast.

This picture is from the University of Colorado School of Medicine Department of Pediatrics.... partly because I wanted to have a pediatric-themed pic in this most momentous of blog posts, and partly because it's so DAMN CUTE.

I'm psyched to know what I'm going to do with my life. Really psyched. It's relieving to have a plan in line.

Now... as Emily laughs, watch me decide to become a Neurologist at the last second.

2006-11-26T20:52:00.000-05:00

I went home this weekend for Thanksgiving, and was able to spend some time with my grandmother, for what I am told would be the last time. From within the haze of her dementia and oblivion, she told my mother and I that she has had a great life, and certainly wouldn't mind living it over again. Then she took my hands and told me she hopes I have a great life. And that she wishes me the best. The nursing home says she has a few days left... who knows? The finiteness of human life is heartwrenching.

I Made Hats.

2006-11-26T19:26:00.000-05:00

Happy belated thanksgiving!

Switch Weekends

2006-11-12T22:03:00.000-05:00

For the third year medical student, switch weekends are a point of reference in a vast sea of infinite disorientation. Every five weeks, we close the test booklet on another rotation and take a 48 hour respite before beginning the next. I find that switch weekends are a good measuring stick for both my (hopefully) increasing professional maturity, and for the passage of time, which is all to easy to miss from within the hospital confines.

My first switch weekend was between general surgery and opthalmology. It was the end of July, and I hadn't enjoyed a summer day since mid-June. I rented a car in Fort Lee and drove two friends from Hoboken up to Syracuse to spend the weekend with the family. It was a few days prior to my 26th birthday, and I was hoping to revel in some good home cookin' and TLC. Steve came out from VT, and Dani and Mel stopped by for a few hours. Marc attempted the second annual Tully Lake regatta in a boat that was slowly sinking as he traversed the length of the lake. Jed, the dog, tried to "save" Steve as he pulled away from the dock on his water skis. By night, we watched TV out on the sleeping porch, the mugginess making the bedsheets damp. Bullfrogs hummed. It was the quintessential summer of my youth, caught in just a brief weekend, but it was all I wanted.

My second switch weekend fell over Labor Day weekend. I traveled to Lake George by Greyhound and met Steve by the Pizza Hut. We sat outside and watched end-of-summer tourists file by the t-shirt shops and knick-knack stores. The weather was lousy, so we rented a movie each night. When the rain broke, we went for a run towards Friends Lake and read all the old gravestones... even the ones that were smudged out over the years by erosion, and were sinking into the ground where the caskets lay beneath. The sky cleared the afternoon before I had to leave, and I went kayaking out on Loon Lake with Steve and his mother. They stayed close to shore and talked... but I paddled out into the middle and pretended I was lost at sea, battling the wind and the "high waves"... like I liked to do when I was little.

My third switch weekend, between Ob-Gyn and Psychiatry, brought beautiful weather and fall foliage. I traveled to Albany by Greyhound, and Steve and I crashed in his parent's house in Niskayuna for the night. We spent the next afternoon and night in the Adirondacks, hiking through the afternoon and into the night (without a flashlight, no less) with his mother. The next morning, we got up and apple-picked just across the lake in Vermont. I spent that Monday, Columbus day (a holiday celebrated by the state psychiatric institute, thus providing us with another three-day weekend) hiking Camel's Hump mountain in Vermont while Steve typed away at work. The sun beat down, the colors were beautiful, and I enjoyed a nice lunch at the summit with some of our freshly-picked apples. I even ran into a piece of an old WWII fighter plane that crashed into the mountain years and years ago.

This past weekend was my fourth switch weekend, that between Psychiatry and the much-anticipated Pediatrics. After a Friday night birthday party for my friend and a class party in Hell's Kitchen, I again traveled to Albany for a wedding of Steve's cousin, and enjoyed a tour around the state capitol on Sunday. The weather was in true November form... grey, cold, and rainy. What a miserable month. Still, it was great to see Steve and his family, including his sister and her fiancee, for a quick visit.

These two days passed much too quickly and I find myself more exhausted than I would like, but such is the nature of this year, I guess. And in just five short weeks, the snow will be falling, the "city sidewalks, busy sidewalks" will be teeming with holiday shoppers, stockings will be hung by fireplaces... and I will be 5 weeks wiser, 5 weeks closer to starting my career... and perhaps even certain of my field of medicine!